


You Could Be the One

by Viridian5



Category: Weiss Kreuz
Genre: Drama, Florist Assassins, Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2004-08-28
Updated: 2004-08-28
Packaged: 2017-10-02 09:27:16
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,587
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4870
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Viridian5/pseuds/Viridian5
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Aya has never been wooed like this before.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Could Be the One

**Author's Note:**

> Mentions of "Mission 12: Abschied-- Why," "Mission 13: Bruch-- Rain of Revenge," "Mission 15: Duell-- Hunters of Revenge," "Mission 25: Ende des Weiss -- To the Knights," "Verbrechen," "Strafe," the CDs, "Last Mission 12: Epitaph," and "Last Mission 13: Tomorrow."
> 
> All lyrics are from "You Could Be the One" by The Sisters of Mercy.

_"All God's children give good phone._  
_I called Jesus, he's not home, so_  
_I'm so pleased to talk to you...."_  
\-------------------------------------------

Aya sneered at the arrangement taking shape in his hands. The customer wanted lilies in it, so lilies he would get, no matter how tacky they might look here. Customers should not be told that they had no taste, just as Weiß's adoring public should not be commanded to leave if they refused to buy anything. So Omi had said, before giving Aya a time-out in the trailer, as if Aya were a child to be taught better manners.

Not that Aya cared much. Carefully calibrating the level of misanthropy he displayed had earned him some respite. Here he didn't have to deal with squealing schoolgirls or his too-familiar teammates. Living in a small trailer with the other three, he saw more than enough of them as it was.

He was only still here because he had nowhere else to go and nothing more to do now that Takatori was dead and his sister was awake.

He actually missed his sister more now that she'd recovered from her coma. At least before he had dared to visit her. Now he never saw her.

The cell phone on the table broke the wonderful quiet by playing a disgustingly peppy song. Someone might be calling in an order, though they probably wouldn't be able to fill it. It was a good thing that they actually made their money from assassination, because the traveling florist shop would sink on its own. They never stayed anywhere long enough to create a customer base, and putting out their cell phone number did little good when they'd likely be in a different part of the country by the time anyone tried it.

Still... Aya picked up the phone. "Hello. Kitten in the House floral arrangements." The others rarely let him answer calls. Yoji said that he had a good voice but his phone manner sucked.

"I want to order an arrangement," a male voice said. It sounded muffled, yet vaguely familiar.

"What do you want in it?"

"You and me."

Pervert. Aya pressed the button to end the call and put the phone down.

Disgustingly peppy music played again. It might be an actual customer calling. Probably not, but.... Aya picked up the phone. "Hello. Kitten in the House floral arrangements."

The same voice answered, "That was rude of you."

So was this. Aya ended the call, set the phone to vibrate, and placed it on the table. The phone immediately started to vibrate and rattle against the hard surface of the table. Aya tossed it onto the middle of the couch and went back to his tacky arrangement.

  


* * *

At closing, Aya helped them bring everything inside, then retreated to a corner of the couch with a book, hoping that the appearance of reading would tell them to leave him alone. It usually worked on Ken and Omi, though Yoji could be a pain in the ass at those times when he decided to reform Aya's character by attempting to drag him out for a night on the town.

"Aya! There are 20 messages on this! You should have answered the phone," Omi said.

"I did, the first two times. It wasn't a customer."

"We never get any good messages on that thing, so I'm not surprised," Yoji said. "So, who was it the first two times?"

"A prank caller."

With the phone to his ear, Omi blushed deeply and looked horrified, then put the phone down. "I don't have to listen to any more. I think I get the gist."

Yoji picked up the phone and started listening to the messages. "Well, shit. Aya definitely got a live one. He might even be flexible enough to do some of the things this guy is talking about."

"You're saying that Aya has a secret admirer?" Ken asked. "You're sure it's for Aya?"

Why wouldn't it be? Not that Aya cared.

"Five messages of it so far, and they all mention him by name." But Yoji's smirk started to give way to a more worried look. "This guy's kind of creepy. Aya, you might want to hear this."

"Why?"

"Because if this isn't a prank, you might want to watch your back."

What a pain in the ass. "I'm not listening to 20 messages of that."

"He's says he'll leave a gift here tomorrow."

"He knows where we are?" Ken asked.

"If we don't leave tonight, we'll find out tomorrow."

"Maybe Kritiker should be told about this," Omi said.

They would go on all night at this rate, so Aya had to intervene. "As the supposed object as this man's devotion, I say we stay here, set up a night watch, and see if he really does know where we are. If his gift doesn't show, we're fine and Kritiker doesn't need to be told."

"And if it does arrive?" Ken asked.

"We find him and kill him."

"Very funny."

"It might come to that."

  


* * *

In the morning, a plain white chest sat in front of the door. How someone had left it without alerting them, none of them knew. "It might not be," Yoji said.

"Or it might be," Aya answered. "We didn't hear or see anyone leave it..."

"Let's bring it inside and open it!" Ken said as he lifted it. "Damn, this is heavy. What could be in here?"

"A severed head?" Yoji replied.

"That's not funny," Omi said.

Ken hefted it onto the counter, then unlatched the lid. "Okay, it's full of ice."

"It really _is_ for Aya," Yoji said.

Refusing to dignify that with a response, Aya took a pair of plastic gloves from under the sink, put them on, and reached into the ice. As soon as his hands found an object, he pulled it out.

"Oh, shit," Ken said, while Omi said, "We're calling Kritiker, and we're moving away. I'm calling now."

"I was joking about the head," Yoji said softly.

It wasn't a head. Disgusted yet fascinated, Aya examined the heart in its clear plastic bag carefully. It had a note, in a separate small plastic bag, pinned to it. Aya read aloud, "Don't worry. It's not your sister's."

His own heart had stopped for an agonizing moment before it resumed beating at an accelerated pace. Aya yanked the phone from Omi's hand and said into it, "Is this Manx?"

"Yes. Abyssinian--"

"Is my sister all right?"

"The last we heard, yes. Someone is checking right now."

He couldn't hear anything over the labored sound of his breathing and the panicked beat of his own heart. The gift heart he'd dropped back into its chest.

"She's fine," Manx said. "We'll be increasing the security detail on her. Drive to Okinawa. More instructions and new assignments will await you there."

Even now, Kritiker found ways to avoid waste. It reassured and angered him all at once. "Yes."

"We'll take the evidence into custody when we next meet."

He hadn't even thought of whose heart it might be if it didn't belong to his sister. "Yes."

"We'll see you there." She disconnected.

"We're going to Okinawa," Aya told the rest of Weiß, who looked at him expectantly from the ring they'd formed around him.

"I'll be tracing any calls that come into the phone," Omi said.

"A boring life would be really good right about now," Yoji said.

Aya sat down hard and tried to find some calm. Numbness. Anything. He had the vague idea that someone was trying to talk to him, but he couldn't quite hear it.

  


* * *

_"Threatened creatures, they adore me...."_  
\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

They refused to let him drive. Under the circumstances, he couldn't blame them, but the idle time left him too much opportunity to think. Not that he could dignify what he was doing now by calling it "thinking." The same few, wild thoughts kept flashing through his brain, and he still hadn't recovered from the moment of horror and terror when he'd thought that he held his sister's heart in his hands.

This "admirer" knew him. It might follow that he knew his admirer as well.

Every member of Weiß avoided looking at the chest sitting on the counter.

When disgustingly peppy music played, they all stared at the cell phone as it might bite them. Omi went over to his equipment and gave Aya the nod to pick it up. Why couldn't this asshole have fixated on one of the others? Yoji invited it.

Aya picked up the phone. "Hello. Kitten in the House floral arrangements."

"Did you get my gift?" Even muffled, the voice sounded familiar.

"Yes." Aya noticed Omi making odd hand gestures.... Omi wanted him to talk more, to keep the psycho on longer so they could better trace him. What could he possibly say to this person? "I got your gift. It wasn't in my size."

Ken made a choking noise, while Yoji laughed and said, "Great. He'll dismember you after he rapes you and before he kills you."

"It wasn't to my taste," Aya continued.

"Upset? I _told_ you it wasn't your sister's. It would be perverse of me to woo you by giving you _her_ heart."

"Since you sent me a human heart, I thought it best not to underestimate your perversity."

"You're funnier than I thought. I'll see you soon." The admirer ended the connection.

"Please tell me you got him," Aya said to Omi.

"I didn't. Something odd was happening with the signal...." Omi sat up straighter. "This guy is a professional. Or he has someone professional helping him with this."

"He said that he'll see me soon."

"Not unless he's in Okinawa," Ken said, then asked, "_Is_ he in Okinawa?"

"He knows me," Aya said, "so maybe I know him. His voice sounds familiar even with the attempts to disguise it. Which of our enemies would do this? Not many of them are still alive."

"Schwarz maybe," Omi answered. "We never found any of their bodies after Eszett's building sank into the ocean, and _we_ survived that. It's also their standard operating procedure to play with their enemies' heads."

They'd had some plans of their own for his sister. At least she had her own security now, not that she knew it.

He'd wanted a normal life for her....

He thought about Schwarz, their voices and killing styles, and said, "It's Farfarello. He might be taking some assistance from Schuldig, but I'm sure it's him. I recognize his voice now." It had to be the both of them together, since Farfarello didn't attack this subtly.

"To have Farfarello wanting you... that is so creepy," Ken said.

"He doesn't want me. He's fucking with my head." And he would die for this. Now Aya almost hoped to see Schwarz in Okinawa.

"I have our directions," Omi said as he put the phone done. "Manx will pick up the chest when we arrive there."

  


* * *

"It's time for you to go to hell," Aya said as he pulled his katana free of the last man in the room. As sick as it might be, he felt a transitory peace as he killed, a calm, clear emptiness. It lingered for a few moments after as well, until he remembered that it was a terrible thing to be good at this and a worse thing to enjoy it.

Calm. Quiet. Nothing.... Then he once again heard the hum of computers and a slow dripping sound that could be beads of blood falling from his katana or white coat.

He wiped his katana clean and sheathed it, then stood at the door to listen for other possible opponents. Hearing no one, he opened the door and saw a body bleeding into the carpet. He hadn't made this victim. He ducked back inside the room and locked the door as he heard a familiar voice say, "I got bored of waiting. Aren't you glad I spared you the trouble of killing him?"

Of course, he couldn't be lucky enough to be cornered in a room that had windows. The ventilation shaft was much too small for him. Thus, he had to go through the door.

Into his headset he said, "My admirer is here. I'm going to try to get past him."

"Abyssinian, wait for at least one of us to arrive," Omi said back.

Farfarello knocked on the door and yelled, "No need to be shy."

Being locked in a room with the dead made too perfect a metaphor for the past few miserable years of his life. "I'm doing this. Abyssinian out." He turned off his earpiece to avoid hearing Omi's protests.

Aya unsheathed his katana and returned to the door to listen and wait. When he listened hard enough, he could just make out the sound of Farfarello shifting. Aya unlocked the door and slammed it open in a rush, knocking his opponent away. For a moment he considered running, but Farfarello would follow. If they didn't settle this now, it would still have to be settled later. There would be more calls, fights, gifts.... He attacked, and Farfarello parried.

"I'm glad you're ready to play," Farfarello said.

"I'm ready to kill."

"You always are. It's one of the reasons I want you."

Incensed, Aya fought harder, but over the clang of steel he still had to listen to Farfarello talk. "I had an epiphany when Crawford spoke of exterminating Weiß, because I realized that I would miss you."

"You realize that you're revealing to me that Schwarz is alive and planning our deaths," Aya answered.

"Why not?" Farfarello grinned. "It won't be much challenge to kill you kittens when we want to. But you're special. I'd rather let you live. You suffer so beautifully. Schuldig agrees, and Crawford thinks it's amusing, and Nagi doesn't care at all."

"I'm not some pet you can buy."

"Buy? No, we're wooing you. I could have just torn out someone's heart to give to you, but instead I took a donor heart from a hospital. A dead man's heart, freely surrendered to be given to another person. It has more meaning."

As much as Aya sometimes feared for his sanity, at least he didn't sound _that_ crazy himself. But it worried him that he understood what Farfarello meant.

They fought. After days of frustration and jumping at shadows, Aya enjoyed having something solid he could express his anger on. Even better, that solid thing was the author of his recent troubles. They spun and clashed and struck. Farfarello reeled when Aya clouted him across the head with the flat of his katana but then unexpectedly surged forward and pinned Aya to the wall, pressing points on Aya's wrist until he dropped his katana.

Aya struggled hard, writhing, but Farfarello had melted to him and would not move, which stopped him from moving much as well. At best, Aya could shake his head a little. The lunatic pressed his hot lips against the skin bared by the pulled zipper on Aya's shirt. His old mission outfit had covered everything and would have spared him this. He continued to jolt around until he realized that it was useless, Farfarello wasn't moving or attacking, and it could only excite his captor, who was hard and poking into his hip.

So he stilled and waited, his thoughts whirling and heart pounding. Yet Farfarello still did nothing, simply stood pressed against him, breathing, smelling of metal and blood, the scents of Aya's night life. White hair tickled Aya's chin and the wet heat at his collarbone distracted him, yet he started to feel calmer. While simply standing, Farfarello's heart-rate and breathing slowed, and so did Aya's, eventually matching his. It was quiet here, weirdly restful. Farfarello's heat and silence wrapped around him like a blanket.

Farfarello started to hum contentedly against Aya's skin, which sent surprising streaks of desire through him. Yet it was a languid desire....

"Aya!" Ken shouted from down the hallway.

And the respite ended. Farfarello jerked away from him and saluted with his sword. "It's a shame the rest of the litter arrived. Good night. I'll have to make this look good...."

Aya found himself sitting on the floor with his head reeling, uncertain of how he'd come to be there. "Balinese, get him out of here!" Omi shouted.

Aya answered, "I'm--"

\--being picked up by Yoji and slung over Yoji's shoulder. How embarrassing. It didn't do good things for his spinning head either, but he said nothing, working too hard at keeping his stomach from flying out his throat.

Omi fussed over him in the car but couldn't find any injuries aside from the clout to the head and a few minor bruises. "What did he do to you?"

"Fought me," Aya replied. "Toyed with me, really. He told me that he used a donor heart because it meant something different."

"Crazy," Ken murmured.

"He says that Schwarz plans to kill us."

"Like that's anything new," Yoji answered.

"Do you think Schwarz's work helped bring us here?" Omi asked.

"That they did something here, then Farfarello's gift forced us to move and Kritiker sent us where the action was?" Aya asked back. "Perhaps." Unsettling, to think that they might have been so manipulated.

At a red light, Yoji looked back at Aya through the rearview mirror. Uncomfortable, Aya zipped his shirt up more when Yoji turned his attention back to the road. He didn't want to be too conspicuously uncomfortable.

Confused by the events of the evening and tired, Aya closed his eyes, drifting, and tried not to think of the calm peace and warm desire he'd felt. Of all the people to find calm with.... But he should be accustomed to his inappropriate reactions by now. After all, he enjoyed killing and sometimes resented his sister.

"Aya, wake up! You might have a concussion," Omi said.

Wonderful. Someone would have to wake him at intervals tonight.

After taking a shower, he sat near the kitchen counter, staring at the cell phone. "Do you think he'll call tonight?" Omi asked.

"Yeah."

But Farfarello didn't. A few times Yoji told Aya to give it a rest already and go to bed, while Aya answered that being woken at intervals in bed wouldn't be any more conducive to getting rest. At 4 a.m., Aya abandoned the kitchen and took the phone into his bunk with him. Within a few minutes after he pulled the covers up, it vibrated against his hand.

"Hello?" he murmured.

"I had a good time tonight." Farfarello made it sound like a date. "Did you?"

Aya wanted to say no. He could, easily. Yet he didn't know for sure if that were true. Maybe his fatigue made him admit softly, "I liked the quiet."

Farfarello did that caressing hum again that had felt so unexpectedly good against Aya's skin. "Good." Then he ended the call.

  


* * *

Over the next week, Aya didn't receive any gifts or calls, and no one from Schwarz visited him. Farfarello was mercurial and insane, so he might have lost interest. Waiting for something that might not come left Aya feeling ragged.

It didn't help that Yoji, Omi, and Ken hadn't given up on Schwarz trying something on Aya and had decided to never leave him alone just in case. Never. Everywhere he went, a member of Weiß went with him. Another person might find their concern touching, but he was too busy fighting down the urge to kill them so he could get some peace. How the hell could they all talk so much? If his control broke, perhaps he could blame the murder on Schwarz.

His guardians all slept now, so he took advantage of the opportunity to slip outside to be alone. The lot they'd parked and hooked up in was on the outskirts of the city, quiet in the early hours of the morning. The cold made his breath steam, and he had to push his hands deeper into the pockets of the coat he'd put on over his pajamas. He might have been better off putting his boots on instead of slippers. Still, he found the chill invigorating too.

"Your littermates are very protective," Farfarello said, walking forward.

Of course. "Have you been outside the trailer every night, or did Crawford foresee this for you?"

The moonlight painted him in blue and made his white hair seem to glow. "Crawford has uses. I'm not devoted enough to sit outside your trailer every night."

Thankfully. "Schwarz isn't ready to kill us yet?"

"Crawford believes in a proper time for everything. Me, I believe that it's always the right time to kill." He smiled. "I'm surprised that you haven't killed Weiß yet. I know you like your quiet."

"Was that the plan behind the wooing, to make me kill Weiß for you?"

"You _are_ funny. I didn't expect that."

"No one does." Were they standing here having a conversation?

Belatedly, Aya realized that Farfarello had him nearly backed up against the trailer. But he could still flee... or fight.

Or let this happen, which seemed to be what he was doing since he hadn't moved away and Farfarello was now pressed up against him. It put disturbing feelings in his stomach. And other parts of his body.

"I missed you." Farfarello said, breathing hotly near his ear and tugging at the fastenings of his coat. "Weiß was always around, and Weiß has nothing to do with this."

"I have nothing to do with this."

"Usually. Why don't you? Do you believe that sex takes a fighter's edge off?"

"Yes." If he had his edge, he would be fighting this now instead of trying not to groan at the way Farfarello's thigh was between his legs and rubbing at parts of him that enjoyed the friction.

"And?"

"'And'?"

"There's more. I can tell." Farfarello rubbed their bodies together and did gentle thrusting motions that made the chill metal wall of the trailer rub against Aya's back. Aya felt it even through his coat. Farfarello's face and hands were cold, but heat blossomed elsewhere, at the core of them, where they met chest to chest, groin to groin. Being so cold in some places and hot in others somehow sharpened all the sensations Aya felt.

"I won't tell you." Creatures like them didn't deserve love or release. If Aya ever let everything inside him loose, he pitied anyone nearby.

"Hmm." Then he put one hand at the back of Aya's head and tilted it down to kiss him, creating another spot of heat.

This was sex they were having, outside, in public, in the cold, with Aya's teammates sleeping on the other side of the wall. And, hard and aching and needy as he was, Aya currently didn't give a damn about anything but the unusual pleasure he felt.

That refusal to give a damn made him worry and start giving a damn. "This is Schuldig at work," he gasped.

"No, silly kitten. Just me."

"No... I mean... telepathically making me--"

"It doesn't feel good?" Farfarello murmured, then sucked at a spot on Aya's neck that made him tremble.

"It... does, but--"

"No telepathy. The pleasure is the only magic here. God gave this to us and made it a sin because He's an evil bastard. Doing this with someone I care for but don't want to make babies with annoys Him and makes me happy. But being happy doesn't make you happy, which is very sad. Here comes the rush."

"What?"

Somehow the rubbing and rocking together became... more, and Farfarello did things with his cool hands and hot mouth, and Aya lost track of it all in how good it felt and finally came while making noises that he would no doubt find embarrassing later. It would also embarrass him later that he'd clutched at Farfarello, but now it seemed like the only logical thing to do.

For a while afterward he simply felt warm and good and couldn't think at all, but then he started to shiver even despite the heat the body still pressed to his radiated. Farfarello hummed again and gently stroked his face with callused fingers.

Aya said, "This changes--" Nothing. Everything.

Farfarello didn't answer, just continued stroking his face and remained pressed against him. For now, they might be the only two people left in the world. Aya surrendered to it and once again felt that odd and much wanted peace as he stopped thinking and just _was_.

That lasted until Farfarello started to move, murmuring, "I have to go."

And at that moment Aya started to feel tired, sticky, uncomfortable, and worried. "What was that?" he asked.

"The quiet stillness? Straitjacket wisdom. When you can't move or go anywhere, you deal with it or perish. I started to like it. I'll see you again." Farfarello kissed his nose, then left at a run.

Aya felt colder without him there, but that only made sense. He closed his coat and walked inside, very carefully not thinking about anything that had happened.

"Nice night, isn't it?" Yoji asked.

Aya nearly jumped, but his voice remained steady. "I suppose."

How much did Yoji know or guess? Of all of them, surely he would be the one most likely to recognize the smell of sex. In the darkness, only the glowing end of his cigarette could be seen, providing no clues to Yoji's thinking. Such as it was.

"You remember what he is, right? One of the bastards who kidnapped your sister. He killed Omi's half-sister. He even told you that his team is planning to kill us."

So Yoji knew _something_. Had he watched?

"I know." Aya knew that Yoji spoke truth, but being lectured ticked him off.

"You know that one of them is a telepath who loves to fuck with people's heads."

"I know."

"Do you want this?"

Aya wanted to shower and go to bed. He wanted to know what Yoji thought "this" was. How could he agree or disagree if he didn't know the terms? Yoji might not even be expecting him to answer.

So he would answer, and with the truth. "I don't know what I want."

The tip of Yoji's cigarette flared. "You--"

"I used to know. It used to be simple. But, against all hope, I got it--she woke up--and now I don't have anything new to take its place. I'm marking time, Yoji, looking for a reason to continue."

"Aya--"

It gave Aya such sweet pleasure to hear the shock in Yoji's voice. "Even my name is obsolete."

Unfortunately, Yoji recovered as Aya started to walk past him to the shower. "Do you think you're the only one in pain? The only one who doesn't know what he's doing?"

"No. But I don't pretend to understand your pain. I can't understand it. Give me the same respect."

Yoji grabbed his wrist and pulled him in closer. "What is this thing you have with him? Are you trying to punish yourself? Are you that desperate for sex?"

"Are you offering, Yoji? Did you watch? Did I sound like I was punishing myself? Did you enjoy the show?" Aya found it poisonously sweet for once to _tell_ someone what he thought.

Weiß thought they wanted to know him. Surely it wouldn't take much to disabuse them of that insane notion.

"If I'd known that all someone had to do to get a piece of you is make obscene phone calls and send you fucking _body parts_\--"

"What, Yoji? Finish that."

"You don't deal very well with people being concerned for you."

That was emphatically not what Yoji had originally started to say, but Aya let it go. "'Concern' always seems to be about making me do something I don't want to do or stop doing something I want to do." Like, take your sister off the machines. Stop hunting Takatori. Get on with your life. Make yourself over into something completely different so people will like you.

"I think this is the most personal information I've ever gotten out of you."

"I'm happy for you." Yoji was idly stroking Aya's wrist, and in Aya's sensitized state it felt too good. Yanking it away, Aya said, "I don't have to explain myself to you."

"You think that it's okay for you to do this because he kills too and you think you can't hurt him."

"Honestly, Yoji? I wasn't thinking at all." And it had felt so good to stop thinking.

Maybe Yoji could see that response in him, even in the dark, because Yoji made a surprised sound. They stood too close, so close that Aya could feel Yoji's body heat and almost taste the blaze of his cigarette. This closeness Yoji kept trying to press on him could not be allowed to recur.

Aya said, "What just happened outside was not a display for you nor an invitation to you. It was what it was."

"Not that you know what that is yet."

Aya snarled.

"Guys?" Omi asked from his bunk, sounding half-asleep. "Is something wrong?"

"Nothing, Omi," Yoji answered. "We're going to bed soon."

"Okay."

"I didn't see anything," Yoji said to Aya softly.

"But you listened?" Aya answered as softly. Yoji's twitch said everything. It left Aya disgusted.

Simply disgusted. He didn't have an exhibitionist streak.

"I'll tell the others that Schwarz is messing with your head."

"Thus signing my death warrant if Kritiker finds out."

The recent kill orders on Ken and Omi "from Kritiker" had been fake, but Weiß didn't trust the true Kritiker much more than that.

"No," Yoji said. "I won't do that."

He desperately needed to get clean, but Yoji wanted to prevent him. "I need a shower--" and a change of clothing, "--and sleep. You can figure out what you're doing whether I'm here or not." He pushed past Yoji.

"I worry about you, Aya."

"I never asked you to." As he locked himself into the trailer's tiny "bath" room, he hoped that Yoji hadn't noticed the sudden thickness in his voice.

Yoji annoyed and moved him, while he left Yoji confused and unsatisfied. Aside from the big issues they'd discussed, it had been a typical conversation for them.

  


* * *

_"You could be the one_  
_To get your flowers pressed...."_  
\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Alone, Aya misted the flowers and didn't think about anything until he heard a soft sound from the other end of the small room. He pulled a knife from behind the pots and spun to face it.

"Will you cut me or water me?" Farfarello asked from a distance away. The hood of his coat covered much of his face but left his razor-edged grin visible.

Aya still held the spray bottle in his other hand. "You could use a pruning."

"Annoyed at me?"

"I am that you broke in here."

"Broke in? No. Nagi thinks locks are funny. I'm surprised that your kittens leave you alone here."

"They thought I'd be safe."

"We've just shown them otherwise. Are you annoyed that it's been two days?"

"No." Given an... association like theirs, Aya had figured that trying to predict anything would be futile, so he'd stopped trying. Yoji had seemed to be more upset at the lack of any Schwarz visitors than Aya had been.

So far Yoji hadn't told anyone what he knew about Aya's dealings with Farfarello, although he watched Aya with a troubled expression any time they were in a room together.

"Hmph. You should be." Farfarello actually looked disgruntled.

"I'm not a teenaged girl."

"Thankfully. They hurt my ears. You need a better clientele."

"We'll change our customer base just to please you. Of course, your team may kill us before then."

"Old news. Crawford has seen a future in which you kitties are useful, so you'll get to live. That's the thing with waiting to kill. Sometimes you lose the urge."

"But that can change."

"It can always change. Crawford asked me if you were sane."

Really. "What did you say?"

"Nothing. He left the room without an answer from me once he realized that I wouldn't stop laughing for a long time. For some reason, he seems to need you sane. Don't know why. Sanity's overrated." Farfarello took the hood off. "You like this place."

Something about Farfarello's movements as he walked over made Aya expectant, made him ache.... "Yes."

Farfarello put his hand out to a lily, letting his forefinger rest just a millimeter from the edge of one of its white petals. "I like this place too."

Having the madman talk to him like this confused him even more than the sex had. "Why are you doing this?"

"You're beautiful."

It sounded like such a Yoji thing to say that it left Aya stunned. But then Farfarello continued, "When you lose yourself in the hunt or kill or sex, you're beautiful. You give everything you are to what you're doing. And I didn't expect you to be funny too. I thought we would just be physical together, but I like to talk to you. Aside from Schuldig, Schwarz doesn't talk."

"Not even Crawford?"

"Every talk with Crawford is a monologue."

"No one has ever wanted to be with me for my conversation before." For good reason. "What do you want?"

"Silly kitten. I thought it would be obvious." The expression on Farfarello's face sent a wave of heat through Aya's body.

Obvious. Of course. He could be so slow in such things. "You're here for that now?"

The expression on Farfarello's scarred face gained shades of smugness as he approached. "Yeah."

"These are business hours."

Farfarello shrugged. "If the other kitties come knocking, yell at them to leave you alone like you usually do."

"I don't--" The kiss interrupted Aya's sentence and train of thought thoroughly. He let Farfarello take the knife and mister from his hands and toss them aside.

He'd always sneered at Yoji for being so easily swayed by sex. It bothered him that he wouldn't be able to do that anymore without feeling like a hypocrite.

It seemed to Aya that his zipper made such a loud sound as Farfarello undid it, and he didn't know how he'd ended up on his back on the hard floor with Farfarello on top of him and stripping him like an expert but right now he didn't mind that. Everything moved so fast, and he wished they could slow down a bit, but the undertow of lust dragged him along too. There was no quiet right now, not with his heartbeat pounding in his ears and the wet sounds Farfarello made as he licked and finally sucked Aya's cock. He tried not think about how it would be so easy for the madman to just _bite_ right now. His hands scrabbled for something to hold onto, ghosting down Farfarello's shoulders and up his jaw and finally settling in his hair, trying to grip the short locks.

Drowning in animal sensation and the thick scents of sex, soil, and flowers, Aya wanted to say something but he could only make inarticulate sounds. At least Farfarello seemed to like the sounds, because he hummed in response, eliciting more. Keeping them as quiet as possible to avoid alerting the others was so difficult.

He was supposed to be at work here, and he would never be able to take care of the plants again without remembering this.

He was so close to coming that he could feel it gathering in his spine, but then Farfarello let his cock slide out of his mouth, abandoned. Aya almost whined in his dismay. Grinning up at him, Farfarello sloppily licked his fingers, then returned to Aya's cock. Sex-stupid and relieved to have that mouth back where it belonged, Aya couldn't figure out what that had been about until he felt something push inside him, and it hurt. He struggled, but Farfarello sucked harder, petted him with his other hand, and moved his fingers inside Aya until they hit a spot that struck sparks of pleasure.

"Fuck...." Aya gasped.

Farfarello murmured something around his cock that made him crazier and sounded almost like "Trying to...."

Aya blanked out as he came, hitting that perfect moment of pleasure-glazed oblivion. Once his brain started again, he became aware of Farfarello sucking at the base of his neck and pushing his hand toward Farfarello's cock. "Finish me," Farfarello growled. "Rough."

It was fair. Aya licked his hand, almost smiling at the near whimper the sight inspired in his partner, then reached into Farfarello's undone pants to put his fist around his cock, which waited, hot and hard and wet, for his touch. Long, hard jerks received the best response, so he went with that. It felt almost like yanking orgasm out of him, but Aya found it oddly appealing. Farfarello thrust forcefully into Aya's fist as he came.

The quiet returned then as they rested on the floor for a while, until Farfarello broke it with a smirk and "You have leaves in your hair."

And probably dirt on the back of his shirt and pants and his bare ass. He'd rather not think about that.

Of course, Yoji chose that moment to knock on the door and ask, "You okay in there, Aya? I know you like the plants but you're taking a long time."

"What do you do with the plants in here that you like them so much?" Farfarello asked softly as he plucked leaves from Aya's hair.

"It's personal," Aya whispered back, then put his hand over Farfarello's mouth to muffle his cackle. To Yoji, Aya yelled, "I'll be done soon." Unfortunately, he probably looked and smelled as if he were carrying on a mad, torrid affair with the plants.

"You have work to do. I should leave you to it," Farfarello said as he fastened his pants. "See you later."

They'd had sex _again_. It just hit Aya now. And he'd been considered so bright as a child.... But he didn't regret the sex. He felt... good, despite the aches. Almost relaxed. "When, later?"

"We'll see. This time, pretend you miss me."

As Farfarello snuck out, Aya tried to groom himself into some semblance of order. When he opened the door for Yoji, Yoji said, "Damn, I was kidding about you and the plants."

Shit. "It makes them grow and bloom better."

Yoji coughed. "I think you're more frightening with a sense of humor."

"Actually, I had a bit of accident." Fortunately--or unfortunately, given the cost--he and Farfarello had knocked over a pot or two, so his story held up better.

"Don't let Ken hear that. He'll start to feel threatened. Being accident-prone is his job."

Aya had no intention of sharing any of this with Ken. "He can keep it."

  


* * *

As Aya walked, he felt a familiar presence. He stopped and turned to glare at Farfarello. In a just world, it would kill on contact.

Unbothered by the death glare, Farfarello said, "We can't keep meeting like this."

"Really."

"I'm serious. We're leaving the country for a long-term job. I don't know when we'll be back."

Aya didn't know what to feel about that. He should feel relief.

"Farewell." Farfarello smiled and stepped out into the traffic. When the next car passed, he had disappeared. At least he didn't believe in long goodbyes. Aya hated those.

  


* * *

"Surprise."

Aware of the sudden motion at his side, Aya riposted the blow with his katana and leapt back, facing Farfarello the whole while. "Are you here to fight?" Their intelligence hadn't mentioned Schwarz for this mission, but that meant nothing.

Farfarello grinned, which made him look somewhat insane. "Nah. Just here to make a date."

Relief and incredulity warred within him. He had his pride. "It's been three months." More than long enough for Weiß to give up on worrying about Farfarello and his intentions.

"I know."

"Abyssinian, are you all right?" Omi asked over the headset.

"Fine. False alarm," Aya answered.

"I'll find you around. See you later," Farfarello said as he turned and walked away in a show of arrogance. Aya could cut him down from behind.

Aya didn't. And when Farfarello came to him three hours later he went along, and after a quiet dinner they had sex in an alley. Thankfully, Weiß had come to expect him to walk off and return at odd hours, so he didn't have to explain himself. He couldn't explain himself.

Yoji did make a grumpy comment about the smile on Aya's face the next morning.

"I'm not smiling," Aya answered.

"On anyone else, it wouldn't be a smile."

It amazed him that in some ways Yoji could know him so well yet be so clueless about him in other ways. It also left him feeling conflicted.

  


* * *

"I have to go again. I'll be back when I can make it."

"Am I supposed to be surprised?"

"You're so supportive." Farfarello tongue-kissed him, then walked away.

Aya stood there, staring stupidly, for about a minute. He hated that.

  


* * *

Yoji and Ken were gone, off to an assignment in Europe that had no set end date. Aya hoped that the change of scene helped them but doubted that it would. Yoji had been looking thinner and ever more haunted lately and become so much quieter, while Ken lost himself in rage and violence, enjoying the killing too much.

There was no reason for them to suffer so. They weren't Aya's friends.

Downstairs, Kyo and Sena stayed. Not a member of the Weiß Aya had started with remained.

Tonight Aya's room seemed too quiet, and anticipation choked him. He'd come to expect a certain visitor at such fraught times. Maybe he was insane, even though he currently looked sane when compared to Ken and Yoji, but he had a theory.

Unable to stay in the room a moment longer, Aya put on his scabbard and coat and went out for a walk. He let his feet take him wherever. Eventually he felt a familiar presence behind him and turned with his katana to strike, feeling a visceral satisfaction and rage as it struck and ground against Farfarello's blade in a harsh sound of metal.

"How far in advance does Oracle see the disasters in my life?" Aya growled. "Every time something truly awful happens, you arrive to pick up the pieces." After Manx and Birman had died so horribly, members of Aya's first team had turned up alive after all and quite insane, and Aya's original katana had been broken against his mentor, Farfarello had shown up. After Omi had left Weiß to take on the name and responsibilities of the Takatori clan and be Persia, Farfarello had shown up. When Aya fell to his worst, lowest points, the one-eyed maniac arrived to talk nonsense at him or fuck him into a more sedate state. "What does Schwarz think it's doing to me?"

Farfarello faced his rage and blade with maddening calm. "He doesn't see so far. The really distant stuff is vague. The detailed events he only gets a glimpse of moments before they occur, same as always. We couldn't do anything--"

"--even if you wanted to."

That one golden eye blazed with sincerity. "I'm here now."

Aya's laughter sounded more like coughing and edged on hysteria. "Yes, you are." He sheathed his katana. Why bother? Why bother with anything?

Farfarello growled. His blade retracted and he hid it somewhere on his person. Aya stripped him on occasion and still couldn't figure out where he kept his knives. "Come out of the cold."

Farfarello was here. Omi, Yoji, and Ken weren't. And he didn't dare let his sister be around him.

"Sure. We can go to my apartment." Kyo and Sena might not even know that Farfarello had been and might still be an enemy. It had been before their time.

They walked into the building with neither of the remaining members of Weiß the wiser. Surely it couldn't be so easy to get in? Yet they just entered quietly. Farfarello could have taken him hostage, could have forced him to let him in somehow, and they wouldn't know to do anything....

Once in Aya's apartment, Farfarello methodically stripped them both, then proceeded to fuck him with as little foreplay and preparation as possible, just what Aya needed right now. He didn't know if he could bear an extended period of being touched. The sex had no passion to it, just comfort and the reminder that his body still lived even though he felt so numb inside. This was the first time they'd fucked in Aya's bed instead of in the back room of the shop or some alley.... Soothed, lost in the slow, steady rhythm, Aya moaned when he couldn't help himself and moved and breathed and finally came. Orgasm wrung most of the taut tension from his muscles, to his relief. He felt a little better now.

Afterward, Farfarello unwound Aya's braid and let the long hair run through his fingers as he murmured, "Waves of red.... I like it like this." It covered the both of them like another blanket.

Aya hadn't meant to grow his hair so long. It had just become too much bother to keep trimming all of it. When it started getting in his way, he'd begun to braid it. Somehow, time had passed.

"I was in the United States," Farfarello said softly. "I fell in love with a woman and stayed."

Yet he was here, now. "What happened?" Aya asked, idly wondering.

Farfarello's laugh sounded more like a dry cough, like death, too. "It didn't work out and ended... messily. Nice dream, wrong person. So I returned to Schwarz."

Because what else could either of them do with their lives? What else were they good for?

Aya felt warm and comfortable beneath the blankets with Farfarello. Usually they had sex in places where Aya didn't dare drowse afterward. Although he ached, it was a good ache, an exertion ache like the ones blade practice gave him. He could almost feel content like this.

It wouldn't last. Farfarello never stayed and certainly never stayed long. In fact, he always stayed for so brief a time that the rest of Weiß never noticed when he was in town. Not that Yoji or Ken noticed much of anything lately.

In any case, Aya should be strong enough to stand on his own.

"I'm tired," Aya said, and he truly was.

"Then sleep." Farfarello made the world a simpler place.

When Aya awoke, Farfarello was gone, just as he'd expected. No one stayed. Aya turned his face into its usual mask and got out of bed to change the sheets and keep on living.

  


* * *

Schwarz had arrived for the assault on Tuji and Epitaph, but Farfarello hadn't been with them. When Aya asked the surviving members of Weiß if they'd seen him, they assumed that he'd be relieved that the berserker remained unaccounted for, and Aya let them continue to think that. He wished he could ask Oracle or Schuldig if something had happened to Farfarello, yet who could trust any answers they'd give? Oracle might have had some plans for Aya's association with Farfarello. Whatever they were, Aya doubted that Farfarello had continued to completely abide by them. Nagi might work for Kritiker now, but his answers couldn't be trusted either. He might not even know.

Farfarello might be fine. Aya might be worrying over nothing.

But having lost Sena, Asami, and Kyo to murder and Yoji to a coma, he couldn't believe it. Farfarello was a killer, as he was, working in a profession that offered numerous easy ways to die.

Farfarello didn't show in the days afterward either, when usually Aya could depend on him appearing after every major emotional upheaval. Aya would just have to deal with his pain on his own, as he should.

Everyone around him suffered and often died anyway.

When Omi offered a long-term assignment in the United States, for him alone, he saw no reason not to accept. He needed to get away, and alone was safer.

  


* * *

Aya felt horribly exposed in this hospital bed, with his IV line tether rendering him even more vulnerable. Some Americans who claimed to be associates of Omi's had come to tell him that he had nothing to worry about and would be safe here. It seemed that Omi had even gotten him transferred to a different hospital from the one the ambulance had taken him to. Still, he couldn't trust it. Omi was in Japan, while he was here. In the months Aya had worked here, he'd never seen these particular people before.

He'd decided that he would yank his IV out of his forearm and use the line and the stand as weapons if someone came for him. As bad as his stab wound was, it hadn't left him completely incapacitated, as anyone who attacked him would see.

Just because Aya couldn't see much reason to live didn't mean that he wanted to be murdered in a hospital while too injured to give a good account of himself.

"I'm told that this is a good hospital," someone said from the door, another patient in a hospital gown towing his own IV stand along. A redheaded someone with one green eye and bandages covering what should be his left eye and what would no doubt be very familiar facial scars.

"I don't know," Aya said. "I may be going insane."

Laughing, Farfarello sat down in the chair next to Aya's bed. "This is as undercover as I get."

"Did you put your own IV in?"

"It's not a big deal. It's not like I can feel it. With my experience, I could almost be a doctor. I like hospitals. They're like big toy stores. I'll be taking home mementos." Farfarello leaned over and kissed his brow. "I miss being able to play with your braid. You have to let your hair grow again. Went to a lot of trouble to find you."

It took effort to keep his voice steady. He blamed the drugs. "I didn't see you at the assault on the school. I didn't know what to think."

"Crawford thought that your presence and all of Tuji's talk of God might make me too crazy so he knocked me out and hung me from the ceiling in a straitjacket. I was _pissed_. By the time I got down and free, your cunning arch-kitten had already started to cover over your trail. By the time I caught up with you, I found you crumpled against a mailbox with a knife in your gut."

Now Aya knew the identity of his savior/tormentor. "You called it in?"

"You didn't want to be saved. Stupid kitten." Farfarello whispered into his ear, "I killed your attackers for you. The whole murderous nest."

It made Aya shiver.

"I broke from Schwarz, which is why it took me longer to find you," Farfarello continued in the same fashion, directly into Aya's ear, directly into Aya's brain. "I left them completely. I have an offer I want to make to you."

"All right."

"This is a big country. There are still quiet places here. Break away with me. You're dead to the world and dead to Kritiker. Your Omi is using you as his tame killer zombie. You said goodbye to your sister. Break away with me. We could stay here and play with flowers or corpses. Or both, whatever you like."

"A new start." The thought of it hurt almost as badly as his stab wound had.

"You get well in this hospital, keep your false face on as you tell everyone what they want to hear, then once you're free we disappear. Fall off the map. We forget our names and become new people."

A smile felt strange and unfamiliar on Aya's face. "You want us to play hooky."

"For the rest of our lives."

"In the quiet places." Instead of pushing futilely at the wall, he could climb right over it into an entirely new future.

"Or wherever you want."

"You should go back to your room, sir," a nurse said from the doorway.

"I got bored and lonely," Farfarello answered.

"We can't have you bothering the other patients."

"Yes, ma'am."

Farfarello would be taken away now, leaving Aya alone to his brooding. He grabbed Farfarello's hand and mouthed "yes." The answering grin made Aya feel very much alive.

  


* * *

"The nurses said that someone came in here," one of Omi's self-proclaimed associates said.

As much as Aya hated them, at least they briefly provided company and distraction during the sameness of the days here. He hated hospitals. They made him feel so powerless. Having Farfarello to look forward to made the days seem even longer, yet he couldn't regret having something to live for.

Aya had to deflect all concerns about Farfarello. "It was another patient. I think he was high on painkillers. He just talked at me."

"It could have been dangerous."

It could have been. Aya's "protectors" hadn't bothered to leave him much protection. "Fortunately, it wasn't."

"We'll have someone on the staff keep a watch on you."

Oh joy.

  


* * *

_"Going for a ride._   
_Destiny can't be denied...."_  
\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------__

Somehow Aya had survived the tedium to arrive at this moment. Just getting the damned IV out of his arm at last, being untethered, had been sweet. As he signed his release papers he worried again, because he had no way of getting word to Farfarello nor any idea where his supposed benefactors intended to take him. Omi had vouched for them during a phone call, but they still didn't feel right.

A limousine waited outside at the curb, and Aya wanted to break the beefy hand that currently rested at the small of his back and made "get in" motions to him. He had to decide now if he would go with them. There were two men and a driver. He knew he'd lost some of his edge during the enforced inactivity of his convalescence....

Aya heard the roar of a motorcycle approaching and then saw it speeding along the sidewalk toward him. This had to be his ride. As it came closer, he broke free of his escort and ran toward it, even though he felt like his wound could rip open again at any time. But the motorcycle sped past him, hit one of the men straight on and then sideswiped the other, knocking him to the sidewalk. When the driver pulled a gun, the rider threw a knife into his eye. _Then_ Aya was given the hand motion to mount as the rider's other hand briefly flipped the visor of his helmet up to reveal one tawny eye and an eyepatch.

Aya took the helmet offered to him, got onto the motorcycle, and held tight.

  


* * *

Sometime later--Aya couldn't tell how much time through the blur of the road and increasing pain in his gut from the vibration of the motorcycle--they stopped in a parking lot. Farfarello took his helmet off and said, "Now I want to rescue you every day." The red in his hair had faded to a blatantly unnatural shade.

"Hnh," Aya said and winced.

"Shit. We'll be using a car after this. I left it in this lot."

"You have a car ready?"

"I got bored while you were in the hospital. Now we have places to go and things to see."

"Prescriptions to fill."

"We should do that soon and somewhere far away from where we'll stop for the night. Hungry?"

"Hell yes." His days had come to revolve around the three daily meals he received, and he'd always be hungry at least three hours before the next one would arrive.

Farfarello walked and Aya staggered into the diner. As they sat in a booth, Farfarello grinned at him, and it brought back the joy of freedom he'd felt. Aya asked, "How did you know when I'd be released?"

"I had a spy on the staff. He had a whole story in his head about our forbidden love, and I worked with that a little."

"Our forbidden love."

"Our families are bigoted assholes. Your family especially, since they have something against bisexual, one-eyed Irishmen. You know, you don't have to go with me."

Farfarello's talk always went in sudden whiplash turns, but right now Aya didn't have the strength to follow. "What? What are you talking about?"

"Just because I got you away, doesn't mean you're indebted to stay with me."

It took a moment for the meaning to truly hit him, but once it came Aya found the shaky beginnings of a smile on his face. "You might not believe this--"

"Yeah?"

"But I needed to hear that to make me stay."

Farfarello snorted with amusement. "Had enough of debts?"

Aya thought of years of debts, of things he'd owed his dead parents and his comatose sister and Kritiker. "Yes. I'm sick to death of them."

"Debts 'til death do we part, and we're dead now, many times over." Farfarello lifted his glass of ice water. "To getting lost."

Aya didn't know what tomorrow would bring, and right now that seemed like a good thing instead of a frightening one in this new world and new life. Charmed, feeling lighter than he could remember being in a long time, he clinked his own glass against it and said, "To staying that way."

 

### End


End file.
